A dot in a page

Have you ever felt that you want to be a dot in a page –and especially in one page that no one wants to open- when the things in your life are not like you want?

When your courage is over? When you cannot find the power to continue? When all your life seems without any meaning?

When I am in a situation like this, this is what I wish “to be a dot in a book”. 

What a wonderful sense. To feel absolutely safe. In a place that no one can touch you. No one can hurt you. No one can use you.

Wonderful. It is a place that I think everyone has invented for himself. For me, is a page in a book, for someone else, for example, maybe is the sea sand, the water, a tree in the forest. In a place that nobody can distinguish you between the others, so you can continue you life easily and quietly.

I wish existed a place like this. A safety box for every one.

In the moments that you feel so weak, so vulnerable, so fragile life might to open you the door of the safety box.

A place like a dollhouse that no one can get inside. There is a place for special habitants only.

Sometimes, when I sleep after a very difficult day, and I cover myself tight with my blanket, I feel that every fear disappears. And then, I don’t care about the tough day I had. I make a fantastic word in my mind that I live there only with my beloved persons and everything is perfect.

There is a spiritual exercise in one of the Asian arts (I don’t remember, I think in yoga) that says to you: Every night close your eyes and open the door of your house (chose a house with courtyard to have one more door. Open the door and “welcome” any person you don’t like. Start this way “Welcome Mary, welcome John, welcome Larry…” and when every one pass the courtyard and get in the house, then you close the door behind them. And when everyone is comfortable, you open the door and say “get out Mary, get out John, get out Larry…” and when all the guests are gone you close the door behind them. You do it until all these persons stop hurting you.

It is not as easy as it seams. In the beginning, you feel fear to say “go out” to your boss for example, or to a very hard colleague.

Step by step!

But when you do it, it is like a rose blooms in your heart. And after this, maybe you don’t need the page anymore.