Game over

My dearest Mr. Winter! My dearest you! What shall I do without you? You say the most emotional and wise things without knowing...

Like all the genius persons, you don’t understand what you worth!

You are always wiser than me. You are always one step ahead, in spite that you are so much younger than me.

I just want to say to you that sometimes I feel so tired and desperate and lost and terrified. I admit it. I am not so strong and I don’t have as much courage as you think I have.

Yes, Mr. Winter, “Game over”. Don’t freak out. It is normal.

Yes Mr. Winter “Game over”. This is the end. The end of many things. You don’t know my life as I don’t know yours. But sometimes you have to end a game. Even if you don’t want to start a new one, you have to finish the old one.

Yes I am stuck, I am trapped, disappointed, unhappy, afraid, terrified, out of power…

I want to leave and start a new life in another place, hoping for better luck, life, money, work, salary, etc, etc…

Sometimes I cry, because I don’t see any way out. I cannot understand that, even despite of my personal misery, I am at the light side of life.

Some moments I feel like I am 200 years old, like I am the most failed persons of the world. The most useless, the most antisexual. The most unlucky person of the world. Sometimes I feel that I am fool of effects with nothing good.

I want to shoot myself or -to be more specific- I beg someone to shoot me.

I am snailing, I am crying, I am empty.

And then, for me, the game is over. I really want to stop this game. But I cannot.

But, you know, bad mood is like virosis. It has three days life.

You asked me, with all the love of your heart “Can’t you RESTART the game?”

And as you wisely ascertained “yes, I can”.

I can Mr. Winter. I can. That’s why I am here. Because I have and endless energy and appetite to live. Even when everything around me is black and I see only the misery of life.

Dear, Mr. Winter, I want to make a confess to you: “Misery is not a word for Farah”.

Trust me. “Game over” will come with my last breath.

Relax, my dearest. I cannot feel misery with you in my life!

<3